Her Colors

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Blue is the color that always reminds him of her. Like the sunlight on his skin, her warmth, her brightness — it’s her that is the most important thing to him. It is how he feels, she who saved his life, who took his family, who was never one to leave the team, who supported him through so much, she who was there to hold his hand.

Red is the color that sticks to her like a coat, because it represents hope, fear, or love — it represents courage, strength, bravery, and courage — it represents what she has always been and always will be, not what he wants to see her, not what he needs to see.

It is her favorite color to see when he first meets her, the color of her eyes as she sees him for the first time after so many months of knowing him. It is a color that has taken over the team, and still is still strong, and still brings a laugh from his teammates, it is an emotion he will never forget, and it is the color of the blood seeping out of wounds he had gladly taken, and still holds him close every time he has to save a life.

It is the color that comes on his favorite shirt, because it is her favorite piece of clothing for him too, and he loves it because she wore it to his funeral. She wore it as a tribute to the team, even though she was only on the team for a few months, and she would not return from that mission because she was on a mission, not even to him. She wore it when she saved his life, and that still stands and he remembers it so well that sometimes, sometimes he looks at it as a symbol, a symbol that he would be lost without it, or would never have enough time to know her again.

Blue is the color that sits on his desk every morning, even when he feels like he can not leave the comfort of home without it, because even with all of the stress of the mission, it has never been the same. 

It was her color, the color that she gave up on, the color that now stands like a reminder of her, and now it is hers. It was the color of her voice as they sat on the roof with her in his arms, watching the city that had never been her home. 

It is her color when they tell her about the mission, and it is her color when he tells her about what they had just endured. 

It is his color when she holds him in her arms and tells him that their fight was worth it, that she will never leave him, that she did not want to.

Red is the color of her hair, the color of the light shining through the window as they stare out of the city, the color of the rain that falls from the sky and carries with it the sound of birds chirping in the night. It is the color of the dress she bought for them just like this one, a gift from her father, a gift she has been planning to give to him for the last few months, a gift that he will never forget. 

Blue is the color of her skin, because she is the one he wants the most to see, the one he can still remember.

She is the color that reminds him of her, and she is the color that he can look at now and only see her in his mind, and she is the color that reminds him of love. And when she is gone, he doesn’t feel her touch anymore. He feels like she has left him. 

Red is the color that sticks to the clothes he wears everyday, when he sits in a corner and stares at a bottle of whiskey, when he stares at his shoes, when he sees the light reflected in the corner of a book of the most important books he has ever read. 

He has not received many gifts in his life, but out of the few, this one he will truly cherish.

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